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Negatvie (N)ellie

BACKWARDS BUCKET LIST


Let’s set the scene: It is 8:30 PM on a Saturday night, and for the next three hours, I will be trapped in a car. Tuckered out from the dance, all of the youth are asleep in the back, and my mom’s boundless energy is evident as she dances to "Take On Me" by a-ha. So, what does the twenty-three year old in the passenger seat do with all this free time? Browse blog topics, of course! I know this will come as a shock to many of you, but I was once again at a loss for what to write about for the upcoming week and looking for ANY source of inspiration (hence my turning to the internet). Like Nero himself, I rejected suggestion after suggestion the internet presented me, until I stumbled upon an idea I had never seen before: A Backwards Bucket List. What is a backwards bucket list you might ask? Well, a BBL (sorry ya’ll, this isn’t college anymore, and I am not trying to reach a certain word count, so we are going to abbreviate 😉) is a list of the goals that you HAVE been able to reach in your life, instead of goals you wish to complete. For some reason, that idea really struck a chord with me, and I felt pretty confident that it was the topic I was going to run with in the upcoming week.

So, maybe picking a blog topic out at 11:00 at night is not the most ideal time. In the light of day on Wednesday morning (as usual, super on top of things over here at Negative (N)ellie), I began to seriously doubt my ability to write a BBL. As I began to travel down memory lane, there seemed to be very few pitstops that would be worthy of making my BBL. Fearing that I would bore my four readers to tears (and reveal how dull my life has been), I attempted to come up with a different topic to write about. However, that searching once again bore no fruit, and so, here we are. Prepare yourself for probably the World’s Shortest (and Lamest) Backwards Bucket List:

Negative (N)ellie’s Backwards Bucket List

  1. Graduated High School. There were occasional times in Pre-Calculus where I feared this goal would not be reached.

  2. Attended my dream school BYU, even if it was only for one year. (Trust me, one year was plenty for me 😉)

  3. Completed my Freshmen Year at BYU with pretty good grades.

  4. Served a Mission for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints in the Michigan, Lansing Mission. Going on a mission was a goal I’d had since I was a little kid, and it changed me so much for the better, just as I always knew it would.

  5. Completed my Associates Degree from my local Community College, which included facing my greatest nemesis, Trigonometry.

  6. Completed one full year of my first job, which has also changed me so much for the better.

  7. Finally discovered the career I want to pursue, and am currently on the path to making that happen.

  8. Put myself out there by starting a blog and have consistently continued to write it for a year and half. (Who else didn’t think we would make it this long? 😉)

  9. Reached my childhood dream of going through the Temple and making and maintaining important Covenants with the Lord there.

  10. Went through some of the hardest, most faith testing trials of my life, and with the Lord’s help, was able to come out the other side with an even stronger testimony.

  11. Taught a bunch of youth about the Gospel, and didn't totally suck at it.

  12. Took a bunch of youth up to Church Camp, and did not lose track of any of them (seriously, this one is a giant feat).

  13. Learned to be confident in my own skin, and be proud of who I am, and the journey I have made.

  14. Supported, and continue to support BYU in all of their sporting endeavors, even though it is real tough sometimes.

  15. Developed my own testimony of my Savior, and a solid relationship with Him, that has helped to get me through some of the toughest of times.

  16. Learned to be confident, open, and proud of my Month and a Half Mission.

  17. Mastered a standing back tuck. (don’t ask me to do it now, it is no longer a trick I carry in my wheelhouse).

  18. Read the Book of Mormon all the way through, by myself, and received a testimony of it’s truthfulness.

  19. Actually, learned to love running.

  20. Have become more and more like mom, who is one of the most Christ-like people I have ever known.

Alright, so maybe that wasn’t the World’s Shortest BBL! (it is definitely up there, though) I think sometimes, we really stink at giving ourselves credit where it is due. Sure, not every single item on my list is a big, momentous accomplishment, but I can honestly say that I am proud of every single item on there. Each of these accomplishments was something that was at one point hard for me, and something that I was not sure I could complete. However, I WAS able to accomplish (or continue accomplishing) each one of these things, and each one has made me a better version of myself.

I am always amazed at how much the Lord is in the small, everyday details of our lives. I can honestly say that a least half of these feats are not ones I had any desire or dream to complete, and now I can’t imagine my life without them. They have made me who I am today, and for that, I will treasure them always. They have shown me that I can do hard things, that I am stronger than I think, and that the Lord’s plan is always the best plan. Just because our accomplishments are not the ones we have been dreaming about since we were five, or the ones the world views as important, doesn’t mean that they are feats we shouldn’t be proud of. Honestly, I think those are the ones that we should be even more proud of! Those are the acts that we didn’t plan for, didn’t prepare for, didn’t want to complete, and yet we did! With the Lord’s guiding hand, we were able to complete things we never thought possible, and come out the other side a little bit better than we started.

So, after this long, rambling post, I encourage you to complete your own BBL. At first you may feel that your list will be short and full of unimportant things, but I promise it won’t. Walk a few minutes down memory lane, give yourself a pat on the back, and stand in awe at all the things the Lord has helped you to accomplish. Be proud of you BBL!

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