THE POWER OF TESTIMONIES
As I walked into the chapel that beautiful Sunday morning, I was feeling pretty in control of my life. I only had one week left of filling in as the teacher at Early Morning Bible Study, and after a month, I was READY to be done. One more week of hectic, chaotic schedules, which, if I am being honest, still had me stressed out to the max. The finish line was in sight, though, and I could not wait to reach it. As I plopped down into our family pew, and turned to chat with the sister behind me, my mom said nine simple words that brought my world crashing down.
“We got the dance. The date is October 19th”
Everything came to a screeching halt, as I turned to her with a look of complete horror on my face.
“What? That’s in like two weeks!” I proclaimed, the franticness oozing out of my voice.
I should have been thrilled! Our youth were soooooo excited to be throwing a Halloween Dance, and going to dances with them is one of my favorite parts of being a Youth Leader! (I just wish they would stop adopting my dance moves. Those things are for sure leading them astray) Instead, i felt completely and utterly overwhelmed. As a member of the Bishopric stood up to begin the meeting, I was suddenly overcome with this intense feeling of defeat. It was the strangest sensation; it was as if the weight of the world rested solely upon me. I have never felt so completely consumed by stress and exhaustion. After a month of keeping two roles at church, working, and staying on top of all the other aspects of life, I was ready to receive some much-needed relief (and I am not even a mom yet, so I really don’t even have it that bad. #dramaqueeen). For some reason, the Halloween Dance was the last straw, and I felt completely broken.
I sat silently in the pew, attempting to hold back my tears, as the music began to play. I couldn’t sing, I couldn’t prepare spiritually for the meeting, I couldn’t wipe the look of anguish off my face. The only thing I could do was stare at my hands and force myself to stay in my seat. My first instinct was to run! The only thing I could think to do was to run out of that building and away from my responsibilities, even if just for a little bit. Some of my most heartfelt, painful prayers were sent heavenwards that day, as I begged for the strength to stay in the meeting. I knew staying was what would be the most helpful, because obviously I needed the inspiration and upliftment that the meeting would bring (plus, I had to stay and help my mom with her lesson). With the help of the Lord, I gritted my teeth, rooted my bum in that pew, and continually prayed. Prayed for distraction, prayed for peace, and prayed for relief from my feelings of burden.
As testimony meeting began, (A meeting where every member of the congregation is invited to come up and share their testimony of the Savior. Seriously, one of the coolest meetings ever!) I wasn’t really focusing on the messages that were being produced. All of my attention was focused on the dance, keeping my seat in the pew, and trying to un-contort my face from the mask of horror it had settled into. However, as the meeting proceeded, and faithful members of our flock got up and bore testimony of seeing the Lord’s hand in their life, things started to change. I could not believe the impact those testimonies were having on me. I could feel my concern, my pain, and my burdens, literally melting away. It was the strangest thing. None of the testimonies they bore were really directed at the problems I was facing, and yet, I could physically feel them strengthening me. I began to sit up straighter, tear my gaze away from my hands, and produce a normal facial expression. Grateful for the ability to begin relaxing in my seat, I settled into what I knew was going to be a great testimony meeting. Unfortunately, a different thought began to run circles in my mind:
“I am not getting up there”
I had a firm, steadfast belief that I was not going to be making the trek up to that stand. There was no way! I had been on the verge of tears for the past thirty minutes! If I got up there now, there would be no containment of the flood. Nope, it was not going to happen. I was just proud that I had been able to stop myself from sprinting to my car. I had done enough, and I was content.
Well, we all know how this story goes, don’t we? All of a sudden, I felt my bum lift from the seat I had so firmly planted it in, and watched in disbelief as my sandals carried me all the way up to the podium. Terrified beyond reason, I began to bear my testimony of how the Lord had helped me as I had filled in at Early Morning Bible Study. As I spoke of what a wonderful opportunity it had been, (but that it was NOT an invitation to fill in for the calling fulltime!) not a tear was shed! I walked back to my pew, embarrassed, but glad it was over. Immediately, happy, peaceful emotions began to take over my negative brain. Just thirty minutes earlier, I had felt as if I was carrying the weight of the world all by myself (I know, could I BE more dramatic?). To my complete surprise, bearing my testimony transformed my feelings of defeat into feelings of joy.
I needed that testimony meeting. Through it, the Lord was able to swiftly answer my tender prayer, and give me the strength I was so desperately asking for. As the saints around me bore their testimonies of Jesus Christ and our Heavenly Father, and as I surprisingly got up and bore my own, I was amazed by the endurance I received. Jesus Christ truly can make our burdens light, in so many different ways. From the people around us, from feelings of peace, and from our own actions that lead us closer to Him. I am forever changed because of that testimony meeting, and now have a newfound strengthened testimony about testimonies 😊. Bearing our testimony truly does give us power and reaffirms in our minds the things we know to be true. It also allows us to uplift those around us, in ways we cannot possibly imagine.
So, if you are getting that urge to share what you know, follow it. You never know who you are helping. It might just be you!