MY FATHERS

While listening to the Mother’s Day messages shared that bright, Sunday morning, I was touched by the kindness and thought the speakers put behind their words. Carefully, they worked to make all women feel special, those that had children of their own, and those who mothered many through their teaching, service, and love.

As I pondered over the many wonderful women who had mothered me over my twenty-six years of life, I came to recognize that another group of people deserved recognition for their enormous contributions.

My fathers.

Grandfathers, uncles, teachers, coaches bishops, leaders, friends’ parents, ancestors I have yet to meet. I do not once take it for granted that I have had so many incredible men mentoring me throughout my life.

They have helped to shape me, love me, and care for me. Each and every one has embodied different examples of what it means to be a father, and as such, I think they deserve the loudest of shout outs today.

Grandpa Bjarnson: Example

On a consistent basis I am asked why I have no desire yet to be married. My usual response to such inquiries is fumbled and rushed, but not today. Today with time and words and deep breaths on my side, I am here to set the record straight.

This man. He is why I have no desire to get married. He set the bar so, so high, I have honest fears that no one will be able to reach it. No one will be able to love me as he loved Grandma Jane.

But even so, I refuse to cave. I will not get married until I find someone as kind as he is, as devoted as he is, and as serving as he is.

Grandpa Ash: Laughter

I didn’t get to know him for as long as I might have wished, but thankfully, I know that someday we will have lots of time to catch up and debate over which Beatles record was the best.

What I do remember of my Grandpa Ash though, is laughter. Whether poking fun at himself, or assuring me that I didn’t get a stye on my eye from peeing in the street, Grandpa Ash did and does make me laugh on a regular basis.

And with many encounters like the one mentioned above, I am always grateful for laughter.

Grandpa Jackson: Adoration

Although Grandpa Bjarnson was the one who showed me what I deserved in being loved by a man, Grandpa J was the one who gave me that love.

Being adored by him will forever be one of my favorite parts of this life. I always knew there was a place for me on his lap or tucked in his arm. I could always count on him for a kiss on the cheek, a charming grin, or a loving display of the truth.

I miss our Grandpa & Granddaughter dates more than you could ever know, and I doubt I will ever win at Hearts again without you there to help me.

Uncle Robbie: Acceptance

The only one not related by blood on this list, Uncle Robbie has never once in my life made me feel that way. I have always felt like one of his own, and might live by the nickname, “Cousin Ellie”, if I could.

That house always felt like an extension of my own, a place where I could laugh until I cried, watch How To Lose A Guy In Ten Days on repeat, or even receive medical attention. (Remember when you had to tend to my stye-splosion?)

Thank you for helping to create my home away from home.

Uncle Dan: Friend

My Uncle Dan is someone I felt like I’ve always had a connection with. Dark jokes tend to bind people together.

And, despite the fact that you refused to pose as my date at the wedding, I still consider you an incredible friend. You laugh at all of my jokes (something I’ve yet to get your older brother to do), have great music recommendations, and are willing to buy tickets to a sold out basketball game just to spend some time with me.

That night with you is still one of my favorite memories from BYU.

Uncle Sam: Service

I’ve never really felt as if you were my uncle. The twelve year gap between us just never seemed that big. In my eyes, you’ve always been more of an older brother who led the way and carved some of the paths that I would follow.

Which is why it made it so easy to call on you when I needed help.

Lost, confused, and homesick, after a month at BYU, I knew I couldn’t do it alone anymore. So, I reached out to you. And you came, right away.

Parked somewhere on the mountain, and squeezed into the cab of your truck, you gave me a blessing that I most desperately needed in that moment. One that gave me the peace I had been searching for. I can never repay you for that.

Uncle Mike: Comfort

I don’t know if you will even remember this interaction, but I do.

You had been playing with me, laughing at the nonsensical words I was calling you, when Grandpa felt we had distracted him from the game on the tv long enough.

Hurt and heartbroken, I made a mad dash to the back of the house, flung myself on the bed, and cried.

And then my Uncle Mike came to sit down beside me. I’m sure you would have much rather watched the game, instead of tending to the snot-covered “Eleanor-Smellenor”, but you stayed with me. Remained at my side, telling me silly stories you made up until a smile returned to my face.

Your dry wit still puts a smile on my face.

Uncle Steve: Role Model

“You remind me so much of Steve.”

That is a remark I have received from my mother more often than I can count, and I could not think of a better compliment.

When I think of Uncle Steve, I think of steadiness. I think of reliability. I think of someone you can always count on.

I think of someone with a wicked sense of humor. I think of a loving father who has raised some of the most remarkable children. I think of a serving heart. Someone who always performs his duty. I think of a hard worker. I think of a provider.

Who wouldn’t want to be like that?

Dad: Righteous Leader

There were so many qualities or traits I could have placed by your name, but it didn’t feel quite fair to the others to do so. Instead, I tried to pick the piece of your character that has most affected me, inspired me, and protected me.

Your righteousness has left a lasting impact on me, more than you will ever know. Watching and observing your diligence to try to always make the right decision rubbed off on me. It challenged me, giving me the desire to do the same. To be like you. To make you proud.

This attitude has blessed me countless times throughout my life, and I have no doubt it will continue to do so in the future. Thank you, for leading me to seek to do my best, and for teaching me through your actions that such is all He asks of us. To try.

My life has been eternally changed by the influence of these wonderful, inspiring, compassionate men. I would not be who I am today without each of the marks they’ve left on my soul.

I will forever be indebted to these fathers, however, I am even more indebted to my Heavenly Father for giving them to me.